Medicine Plants. Magic Mushrooms Experience. The World of the Magic deep in the Woods.

Hola, Everyone!

This time the path of the life brought me deep into the woods of Canada. Freedom, no one around me, just Mother Nature... and... Despite there wasn't any from people around me in the forest, I wasn't alone. I was surrounded by different sounds. Many small animals were playing around, birds were singing they beautiful songs, the wind was playing with a trees and the leafs were they calm voices...

And, at the same time, it was quiet... my thought were quiet. It was total calmness and peace... The dream came true...

My dream... It's a very good question, because I have lots, lots of dreams. But, what about my purpose? If that is far from my dream and I never wanted to be whom the Universe wants me to be?... And, even now, when I see this path so clear, I can't even say do I want it. It is just the inner calling and I just following my inner voice...

My dream..., my dream is to live in a nature, in a little house made from logs. My dream is to wake up in the morning, to gently kiss my beautiful, loving partner who still sleeping, the child who also see some kind dreams in her bed..., to go outside and say Hi to Mother Nature..., after that just to go into a river, or lake, which is right here and swim, naked, in a fresh morning water... And no one around. I am deep in the woods. And my dream that all my loving family and the best friends could visit me anytime. And I could visit them too.

Is this dream connected to what my inner voice tells me?... I hope so...

What can I do now, to make this dream true?... That a very good question... so, let's start to look for the answer...

And here, my Magic Mushrooms Experience...

The Inner Calling...

Three days in a forest, alone, swimming naked in the morning, making coffee on the fire, playing music... For the three days one of my dream came true. It was wonderful time..., I was free, I was myself, I was home!

And, when the evening came...

It was getting darker, but, I still could see that gradient of the colors in the sky - golden, orange purple and dark. You know those colors -on one side, when the Sun is down already, the sky is still bright, golden, sometimes red or orange... and from the other side - a night painted the the sky in its own colors. Beautiful picture of Mother Nature.

I've started to make a fire.

The Medicine was calling, so it was the time to take it. Just a little bit..., but that was enough.

I took my guitar and looked up. The first stars have started to showed..., the lights from million years from here... More and more of them has started to decorate the sky in the beautiful Milky Way of the endless Universe...

The Medicine has started to work. I've started to play my guitar. The Fire was my teacher those nights. I was playing and listening the sound of the flame. And the Fire, the Spirit of the Fire started to talk to me. I put my guitar down.

-" The first lesson for you is gonna be concentration "- the teacher told me.

-" How can you navigate yourself on the World of Spirits if you can be easily distracted even in this world. The World of Spirits requires lots of concentration. Concentration on your purpose, on your goal, which brought you here."

I was listening..., the flame..., and it was so hard to stay with it. I'm not good at concentration..., yup, that is not my strong part. But at that time I did the best I could. And other spirits has started to come. I saw some silhouettes around me, I felt they presence. They looked like humans, but didn't have any material form... I can't remember my emotions at that time... For me there were only me and the Fire.

I was listening the flame, concentrating on one particular sound of it. And the Fire started to talk to me again..., but this time not in the form of words, but it the form of visions...

And a Wolf came, the spirit of the Wolf. He invited to go with him. The Spirit offered me to show his world. The Fire opened this world for me. And I became a wolf. The Spirit of the Wolf took me with him. We were running through the forest, breathing deeply by fresh and warm air... I didn't know, where we were going. At some point we stopped and other wolves started to showed up from behind trees and bushes around us. They were coming closer and closer to us. It was a pack.

-" We accepting you" - the first spirit told me - " Now you are one of us"

It was my honor be among them.

A little bit far from us, on top of a high hill I noticed a one more wolf. He was alone. He was much bigger, than others. He was standing by the edge, looking straight. His posture.. his look... even without making a sound he resonated the mighty, wisdom and strength. He just was above everyone in this forest's world.

-" It is not time for you to meet him" - the first spirit, who appeared to be the leader of the pack, told me.

-" We will show you our world" - said the leader of the pack.

And we started to run again. It was hunting time. The pack noticed a bison. (There is no bison in the area, where I was physically at that time, so I guess, the spirit brought me a different part of North America). They took the big animal down.

-" Eat" - told me the leader.

-" But I don't eat meet, except chicken" - I said, still being in a shape of a wolf.

-" Well, we don't have any another food for you. That is who we are and that is what we eat' - he answered me.

After short hesitations, I accepted my fate. It was interesting, I could see myself eating the bison. I could see his blood on my face and his flash in my mouth..., but..., I couldn't feel the taste. It was like a deep and very clear vision.

And this vision was over. I came back to the fire, still listening the sound of the flame...

I came back..., and, all of a sudden..., far, far away..., the sound which was very similar to which wolves make, appear. And again, and again, closer and closer each time. A slight shiver ran down my body. And a slight fear I started to feel.

-" There are no wolves in this area" - I told myself. At least that what I was thinking. Looney..., nope, doesn't sounds like. Maybe a coyote?

The sound was getting closer, but still far away from me. But a wolf can't move so fast... Soon the sound gone, but, what was it... well, let it be a mystery...

The first lesson for tonight was over. I can say that I did well. I was good concentration for a person, for whom it is hard to concentrate :))

-" Thank You" - I said to my teacher. It was a very good lesson.

The fire was almost down. I looked up. The night came and brought its own magic into this place. The sky was full of stars. There were soo many of them! The Milky Way was soo beautiful! I raised my hands up. I was the part of this Universe! We were the one!

...The 2nd Night...

The next morning I woke up in my car ( I always sleep in my car at nature, or, if I go on a road trip). It was a good night and I had pretty good sleep. Birds were singing around me, greeting the new day. The Sun was already just a little bit up above the horizon... it was a golden hour!... I took my cloth off and went swimming. Soo Good feeling!... The river was a bit chilly, but it was okay, it was exactly, what I needed. Fresh start. And lots of energy. The Sun was higher and higher, the morning got warmer and brighter... despite, it was end of September already. I made a little fire to boil some water. Quick hot spicy noodles were my breakfast. I was eating slowly, without any rush, looking at the peaceful morning Mother Nature. I just was enjoying and grateful for this moment in my life.

While I was eating, the coffee and cacao was cooking, also I add couple of pine needles to this yummy drink...

The day has started and a little day road trip was waiting for me... but, its gonna the story for another time... :))

I came back from the trip back to my place in the forest. It was a good day - new place, new waterfall. By the time I reached my place it was dark already, and, surprisingly for me - very, very chilly. I had to put on extra layers of cloth to stay warm. And started to make fire right away. Chopping the woods warmed me up a bit, but, my lower back..., I've started to feel a little pain. I guess, the old injures are still here.

It was time for the fire. The little flame light up the space, bringing the light and the heat...

The Medicine, which I took a bit earlier, started to work. I took my guitar and started to play. Just music, fire, nature and me... Surprisingly for me I was playing pretty good. So, I decided to recorded my playing in camera. And, I was like something clicked inside me... I was out of tune. I tried again... missing notes, missing strings ... And again - the same result. It was like the camera, or the feelings of playing in public..., of the feelings of my shyness made me nervous, which was affecting my playing. Okay, one more time, I told myself. The camera was recording, I closed my eyes and let the music flow. And it was beautiful! Playing with the closed eyes, be connected with the sounds of fire, wind and guitar... that was beautiful harmony. I tried different stiles of playing, to go in a different state of my mind. Calm, hard, heavy, drumming, singing... I was looking for my sound, my voice, my strong voice..., strong and calm at the same time. With the guitar to find the right tune was much easier, than to find a right tune with my voice. And, still, I'm close to it, but not here yet. Well. for a person, who prefer to be quiet that's okay that it takes time to find right tune for his voice :))

Fortunately for me, I can practice my singing pretty often, in my car, while driving, for example :))

But, lets back to the fire...

While playing different moods by guitar, different questions and answers were coming to my head.

One question was on my mind - The World of Spirits and my Orthodox believes - how they can work together? How can I connect them? How can I still follow the path of God and the same time to dive into the World of Spirits. And will God accept this my path?

And the answers started to come to my head. The answers, which made me sad and was tearing me apart. At first I thought, that it was God answering. And he couldn't accept the other path. I felt judgement and reproaching in my choice. But something was wrong in all of this... I could feel it, but, at first, I couldn't understand, what was it. And here the experience from the last ceremony with Grandmother came to my head. All those answers, that voice... the energy of it gave it away. I know the energy which comes from God. Love, peace, light, kindness, care..., even when you make mistakes, God still loves you... at least that in what I believe.

The energy this time was different. That difference was like between the light and the darkness. And in those answers I felt darkness. It just wanted to bring me down, to make me feel guilty, to start to blame myself. And I realized that, those were not answers from God. It was totally different force.

Mentally I've started to clean the area around and inside me. Fire was giving the light and warmth, Air was filling up my body and clearing, Earth grounded me and gave me support, and Water was soo calm and kind, refreshing me from inside and outside... The energy, which they gave helped me to clear my mind and my Soul. I cold feel the Wind on my face, could hear it in the rustling of the leaves... The sound of the light waves of the Water was soo peaceful and calming, the Air was soo fresh... Mother Earth under my feet... was a bit chilly and soo grounding..., I felt connected with the roots of the trees of this forest, which were supporting me at this moment... And, Fire - the his warmth, his heat just burned away all the darkness and my inner world lighted up with the kindness and love, care, gratitude and happiness.

And here I felt the energy of the God. That light energy, which I described before... And I could hear Him.

-" I can not help you in this world ( The World of Spirits), you are on your own here. But I will be your light there. I can guide you through the darkness, and show you the way. But I can not protect you there. You need to learn how to protect yourself in that world, to learn, how to stand against the darkness and destructions, and stay yourself. .."

That was the answer for my question.

The Fire was down already, but my work with the fire hasn't finished yet... I started to feel this calling again. I wanted to do fire stepping... I just didn't have much room for hot coal walking at that time...

I was standing right by the hot coals. I felt, like adrenalin fills my body. No fear, no hesitations... just concentration. Deep inhale, deep exhale... and the step forward...

The energy of the fire, I could feel it inside me, so strong, so hot, soo good..., but let's leave this part of the story for the next time...

...I was already in my car, getting ready to sleep. But, the Medicine still was working and I wanted to sing. It wasn't any particular song, it was like... my spirit finally found its tune... I made a deep inhale..., and the melody of my My Spirit, My Soul has connected with surrounding me endless Universe...

... 3rd Night...

The day has started, another day in Paradise. It was chilly in the morning, but... it didn't stop me from the morning swim. Wow... such a great feelings! Some light exercise, Fire, and the hot quick noodles were perfect way to warm up after.

This day I just was relaxing..., enjoying the Sun, swimming ( during the day the air temperature rose up, so it was pretty warm and good outside), walking in the forest, barefoot and... naked :)) It's a good feeling, when you swimming, or walking naked in a forest..., it's a feeling of being yourself, feeling of connection with the nature, feeling of lightness of the body and of the mind...

Btw, during these days I had a very simple food - berries, olives, chees, whole grain bread, canned chilly and canned soup, tomatoes, some fruits, bananas and local peaches... the peaches were soo yummy!..., dark chocolate... yummy yummy yummy, non alcohol beer and... Watermelon! Mmm, I love to eat watermelon in nature, it is soo delicious! And, of course, I had the watermelon separately from the rest of the meal..., and the chocolate too :)) Yummy Yummy :))

The evening was coming. I was thinking to make the fire right by the river this time. And the open sky would be my roof... Before I made fire a little bit inside the woods... I chose the spot for the flame. I had also an idea to take a picture - the fire, the sky, full of stars, river..., that would be the good one..., but my battery died before I managed to take that shot.

I brought a little bit of woods, which I chopped earlier that day. And little bit of a pine needles as a fire starter. I was sitting by the water, waiting for the night. It was very peaceful and calm...

The Sun was down already and the first stars has started to show they light from far far away. Who knows, maybe, they are not even there anymore. The light from the stars, which travels millions years to us, so we could see they beauty from the past...

I've started the fire, my present light for this night. No guitar this time, no singing. Just listening. I was listening the wind, the water, the flame... The sounds were connected in one beautiful and harmonized orchestra. And that melody, the melody of Mother Nature took and lifted me soo high... to the stars, to the endless Universe... And I was a part of it and not here, on Earth, but there among the stars...

The fire brought me back. It needed more woods. I gave couple to the flame. I looked around and realized that I need to go back, through the dark forest to the place, where I chopped the wood. I needed to bring more. Dark forest... At the first view it can look a bit scary, but, in the reality it is totally safe..., at least here, in South Ontario. Unlike Amazon Jungle with all snakes, spiders, scorpions, caimans... and anacondas..., or Australia with the same animals, or, even West Canada, with Grizzlies. Here, we just have a little black bear...

So, it was a good enjoyable walk in the dark. And I liked it. I felt like it was my home there, in the woods, by the water, alone, with Mother Nature.

... I was by the fire again, my eyes were closed. The Medicine, which I took a bit earlier was working already for a while... And another vision came..., or, I just somewhere far. And this time I was in a field and there was a beautiful horse there. He was freely running through the field. Confident, playful, mighty. He came closer to me. He was curious. We looked at each other. His eyes..., I could see his soul there... The soul of the living animal, who can love, care, enjoy... who can be scared and afraid... We were the same, we were equal...

This wild animal allowed me to touch him. I could feel his strong body. The air waived his mane. We were connected, we became friends...

All of a sudden, the pack of the wolves showed up. I knew that pack, we met at the first night.

-" We are on a hunt now, and we came for this horse, he is gonna be our meal for today" - the leader of the pack told me.

This pack, they accepted me for who I am and we were friends to. But...

-" I can not give you this horse" - was my answer.

-" You one of us now, give him to us" - the leader said.

-" This horse is my friend to now" - I replied

-" Well in this case you need to chose. Him or us. It can not be both. This horse is our prey, and you can not change it".

One way, or another, I'm going to lose someone tonight. I just couldn't make that choice. And, at the same time I understood the situation. This is life, this is nature...

-" I lots of respect to you and your pack" - I said to the leader - " And this respect is going to stay, and my friendship to you to. But, this hors..., I just can't and do not want to give up my friends".

-" Well, let it be, you made your choice" - the leader said.

The pack was about to leave... and... I saw Him. The Spirit of the Great Wolf. He came to me in a shape of a human, in a shape of a Native.

-" You made the right choice" - He told me - " That was the test for you. Will you listen to your heart or you will go with what others tells you. And this is another the second lesson for you on your joinery to the our world."

The leader of the pack looked at me. He was smiling. It was a good, friendly smile and I could read the approval of my decision on his wolf's face. No words were needed here, his smile and the face told me everything. The pack and the Great Spirit has gone. I came back, to the flame...

But the night was not over, and the Fire neither to. The Fare was calling me again and I came closer. It wanted to play, and I wanted to play to. So, I touched the flame. Carefully, fast, sliding through. My hands were dancing with the flame. It didn't burn my skin, I just felt a little heat... But the hair in my arms..., well, I still have lots of it :))

I was playing, dancing with the Fire, with respect, carefully. And the Fare was playing with me to in the same manner.

I've started to feel a call within me. The Water, the river was calling this time. I went in, just a bit, below my knees. The river was fresh and not cold. I looked up. The sky, like the nights before, full of stars! Wow! The Milky Way was so bright! I raised my hands up not in desire to reach it but as a gesture of the gratitude.

I was and I am blessed to see this magical sky... and just to be here...

The fresh, cool air was filling up my lungs, I could feel soft Mother Nature under my feet, the Water gave me lightness, and the Fire filled me up with the light and warmth.

Four elements were combined inside my heart in a form of the bright and kind light, and this light was full of happiness, gratitude and joy.

My body still was here, but my soul..., my soul was flying between the stars!... I was a star, which was shining bright in a night sky.

I came back to the fire. It was time to warm up my feet. This time I just put them close to the fire... Feels good!.. And, considering that the air temperature was going down fast, the heat was a really a savior..., and I just was enjoying that moments... The fire was almost down...

-" Hm " - some thoughts started to come to my head - " How can this fire be so powerful, if it is soo little now, and soon will disappear at all?... Maybe, there is nothing special about it? " - I was thinking.

-" Nothing special? " - Fire said - " I can burn all this forest from this one little spark. Yes, I am small right here, on this flame, but the energy inside me is endless. This is only the little part of me here. I am everywhere, and even the Sun is the part of me. I Am the One Great Spirit of the Fire! ".

It was an honor for me, that the Great Spirit was talking to me.

I Knelt on one knee and bowed down before the Fire, showing him respect.

Just a little bit of hot coals left, but, I knew, the Spirit still was there.

It was time time to go to sleep. I turned my flesh light on and stopped. Evaporation from the water completely covered the river and the area. It was magnificent! And again, I was blessed to see this natural smoke on the water, this this beauty...

I looked up, at the stars one last time...

My fingers were frozen..., outside was +5C...

It was time to go to sleep...

P.S.

There was one more vision, which I forgot to mention earlier. So, lets back to the first night...

It happened already after I met the wolf pack. I was by the fie, listening the Flame... It was dark in mi vision, it was at night. And a Spirit of a Native came to me...

-" Are you ready to follow this path? " - He asked me

I knew what he meant. Discipline, concentration, studying, learning. Two weeks ago I was really far from it. And I was far from my best shape..., which was years ago... But, I still remembered that feelings, when I was in a perfect condition, disciplined and motivated. Nothin could stop me than... And, I wanted to come back that state of mind, to that physicals form...., I just needed some good push... And the ceremony, which was two weeks ago gave me that push, the Medicine brought me back.

-" I Am Ready " - was my answer to the Native, to the Spirit, to Myself.

The Native turned around.

-" Follow me " - he told me.

He brought me to the sacred place. A fire was at the middle, and Natives were sitting around it. They all were a shamans.

-" We were expecting you " - the first Native told me - " And now you can join us here "...

The vision was over...

I know what that means for me. All those lessons, all those visions...

It is gonna be the long joinery...

But, at least, I see the path, the direction...

Now I can see the goal!...

Nature Boy and The Universe

Nature Boy and the Fire

The Night Sky...

Good Morning, Sunshine!

Morning Coffee and Cacao